Here we go again...

Well, after a fairly uneventful summer, school restarts soon: Sophia, September 4 and Anneliese, Sept 10. No worries for Anneliese. This will be the third year with this ECDD room--I know the routine, approximate bus times etc.

I called Sophia's school office the other day. Had not received a bus schedule, although I did get a welcome letter from the principal. The school she is to attend (School H) is not our assigned school, but the same one Sophie attended for preschool last year. We thought the consistency would help her. So, School H has a start time start time of 7:36 am. When I called the school re bus times, I was a little scared to find out time the bus would actually pick up my daughter. I was right to be afraid. 6:36 am???? For a 5 year old??? I heard that and thought "oh, Hell no." Sophie is NOT a morning person, and the thought of getting her out of bed at 5:40 am is not a pleasant one.

Plus, since Sophia has developed a severe flying bug phobia and won't go out side without a LOT of adult encouragement, I knew we were going to need an aide this year. The psychologist we see for Sophia's phobias agrees. I decided to look into the school closest to our home (School D), and see how their buses run. Turns out that School D starts an hour later than her current school. Plus, I already knew they have a Kindergarten special needs aide, as the school district explained to me in the spring that an aide was following to other students up from pre-school.

So, I did a little research today and placed a call to the special ed director in our school district. I spelled out the whats and whys for the director's assistant, and am awaiting a response. Let's hope this is easy to resolve. I don't want to start the school year for Sophie with the kind of big bang that will result if they mess with me. My husband and I agree on the course of action here, though. And, he is already starting to feel sorry for the school district. Gee, am I that big of a wench?

Yep, and more than that if I need to be. My girls have no voice but mine.

Summer 2007 10 Ten List

Well, with summer flying by, I haven't had time to think straight. In no particular order, I decided to compile a list of the stuff going on this summer that is even slightly memorable in my world.

1. Harry Potter!! Final book read, digested and discussed on message boards all over the web. Loved it. Of course, started re-reading the series immediately after I finished Deathly Hallows. And for cool HP essays, check out www.beyondhogwarts.com.

2. Pirates of the Caribbean III--slightly disappointing, but will hold final judgement until the DVD comes out and I can check the special features.

3. Bug Phobias--Sophia is hysterically terrified of flying insects. Starting therapy with a child psychologist next week. Hopefully we will get somewhere with therapy, because I don't think our family will survive with another caged in summer with a child afraid to leave the house.

4. Speech therapy--Anneliese had weekly speech therapy this summer--had to fight with the ISD to get it. She did amazing. More sounds, EIEIO to Old McDonald, simply saying "yeah." A total "life is good" moment.

5. Respite care--Dave and I decided to get respite care twice a month to give us a break. Yee-haw. We get an awesome worker each time--gramma type, and she does great with the kids. So nice to get away.

6. Summer of Bruce--I love Bruce Campbell, and have ever since seeing the Adventures of Brisco County Jr on TV. So, this summer, I bought the series on DVD. Perfection. Then when life couldn't get any better, he is starring in a new USA series called Burn Notice. As the slightly grizzled and washed up agent turned side kick, Bruce kicks booty. Now if I can just forget he ever did the abysmal show Jack of all Trades (nope, not even worth a link).

7. No scrapping--no urge to scrap yet, but bought the Basic Grey Infuse collection. Very nice, but really don't like the direction their designers are taking the paper lines these days. And I just dropped my last kit club. Time to use up some stash. Which leads to...

8. The Conscious Scrapper--great newer blog detailing the reality of scrapping as opposed to the trendy/ Debbi Designer / lets buy buy buy mentality that seems to be taking over the online scrapping community. Reading her posts really gives you a wake-up call if you haven't been thinking about these things. For myself, it was validation of the way I have been feeling for quite a while.

9. Renewed dedication to health--I just re-joined Weight Watchers this month. Had a scary ambulance trip in June, thinking it was my heart. After 4 hours at the ER, it turned out to be severe reflux. So, in addition to losing weight, I went to a gastroenterologist, started a regimen with a homeopathic doctor, and am trying to cut back the dosage of my anti-depressant. Already I am feeling like I have more energy. Can I hear another yee-haw?

10. Bequest--my father brought down some of my grandmother's furniture for me, as well as her wedding bands. I am wearing her anniversary band as my wedding band now. Due to my weight gain, I couldn't wear my own, and this ring fits as though it were made for me. And Dave understands, so is fine with it. The furniture I have started to clean and polish--a vanity table with bench and mirror, and the matching dresser. I loved watching Gran put on her make-up at that table since I was a little girl. Now I want to have the piece in my home where I can see it and remember what an amazing woman she was, and how much she contributed to who I am today.

That is my summer. And as I like to say, Life is surely good. And may it only get better.

So blessed

I was thinking about my girls the other night. Whenever someone hears that both of my daughters are special, I get the "wow, you must have your hands full." Well, I do. Full of laughs, love, funny comments, silly dances and bad knock knock jokes. Like most other preschoolers, I guess. Yes, I get a bit more tantrumming than some moms do--sensory integration difficulties guarantee that. But, as the girls get older, things are even improving on that front.

The real reason I feel so blessed is that my girls are so close. Their disabilities and personalities are completely opposite from each other: Anneliese is an extrovert, Sophia is shy; Anneliese is silent, Sophia is a chatterbox; Anneliese will persist in engaging her sister, Sophia likes her own world.

When Anneliese can't explain what she needs, Sophia helps. When Sophia gets too far into her world, Anneliese pulls her out. Sophia's physical daring and monkey like acrobatics push Anneliese to emulate her sister, helping to develop those gross motor muscles that need strengthening. The girls learn by each other's example. Anneliese wants to follow her sister, and Sophia wants to have fun with her. Sophia and Anneliese are both learning to cooperate and share, something even their schools aren't seeing yet.

As I listen to them laughing and giggling for a 1/2 hour each night after tuck-ins, I know my girlies are happy, love each other and have a best friend. Right now, nothing is more important.

Harry Potter

I am geeked--Harry Potter is coming!! It is like the third British invasion. First, the redcoats in 1776, then the Beatles, and now, Harry Potter, both the book and movie this summer. Unlike the other two invasions, the Americans have been forewarned and are ready and willing to be engulfed.

And yes, I am in that number. I get Yahoo updates every time the name Harry Potter hits the news. I pored over the new Deathly Hallows book covers, looking for any clue to the plot. I held my breath when it was announced that Emma Watson might not return for the last two movies (breathe easy folks--all three leads are signed). And, I haunt blogs and message boards looking for answers to the REALLY important questions--is Snape evil or good? how will Dumbledore communicate with Harry now that he is gone? will Sirius communicate through the mirror he gave Harry? is Harry a horcrux? and what does Aunt Petunia really know about the wizarding world? And lastly, is RAB REALLY Regulus Black, or is that another red herring?

OK, you know I'm obsessed. Hopefully, there are others out there anxiously counting down to the next book and movie. After all, there's just something about Harry.

Summer is here--bring on the scrapping guilt!

Well, between spring cleaning and gardening, I have been a busy woman lately. Deciding what things to toss, what to donate, what to store. Packing away winter coats, sorting little clothes to see what doesn't fit, re-organizing closets. Outside, I am planting new perennials, fertilizing all my plants, pruning bushes and trees, digging out plants that didn't come back after a sudden freeze in the spring.

So, I have not had the time to scrap. About three weeks ago, I was a scrapping dynamo! I did a LO each night for a week. They were pretty good, too (if I do say so myself!). But I have been so busy, I don't have the inclination to scrap. After a day of working, I want to veg in front of the TV.

I do have a project in mind--an autumn album of all the fun stuff the girls did in the fall--pumpkin patch, hay ride, trick or treat, decorating for Halloween. Originally, I was going to do an 8x8 book--but, considering the number of pictures, I am contemplating using an 8x12 Baybox. Sigh. I have never done an 8x12 album, so again, I hesitate to start.

And so it goes. The spirit is willing, but the planner in me is weak. This happens every summer. Let's just hope I can finish the Autumn 2006 album before August 2007 rolls around.

"I am that hero...."

Well, we have discovered Veggie Tales in our home. And, it is a HUGE hit. We all find ourselves humming silly songs, and watching each new DVD with interest. But, the biggest impact has been made by Larry Boy, with his amazing suction cup ears. Sophia is in love. We had to run out to Agape (our local Christian book store) the other night to buy the Larry Mobile for her.

The positive side of the Veggie Tales invasion has been that Sophia is beginning to get a concept of God and the Bible. I picked up the VT bible story book to read to her--after each VT story are the verses from the Bible that the story was based on. She enjoys hearing that read, and having it explained to her.

I'm not sure Anneliese is as enthralled by the biblical aspect of VT, but from the giggles and the dancing she does while watching the show, I know that it is a hit with her, too.

Orca Love

Well, my daughter Sophia is animal crazy, and always has been. Her first word at 8 months was "hitty" (her early word for the cat). At 2 years old, she knew about12 farm animals and what sound they make. Nowt 5 years old, she can tell you all about the animals of the rain forest--what they sound like, say and eat (thanks Diego!). Her favorite day trip is the zoo. She also knows all the different dinosaurs by name, and will earnestly correct you if you misname when.

So, yesterday she came home from, school with a picture collage she made of Orca whales. Mommy, daddy and baby whale she tells me. Very nice. She played with them all afternoon--the next thing you know, she had her little bug catcher cage and inside was her pet orca whale, Richard (don't ask).

She mentions next that orcas are nice fish. So, I explain that fish breathe with gills and lay eggs to make babies, but whales have a blow hole and have babies in their tummies that are born and swim around. She accepted that and ran off to play orca.

Well, I should have known that wouldn't be the end of it--never underestimate an Asperger child. They are too smart for the average sleep deprived mom. Sophia tells me that she is going to be a mommy orca. I tell her that;s great. She proceeds to tell me she has a baby orca in her tummy. At that point, she sticks her stuffed mouse under her shirt, and then pulls him out. "See mama, the baby orca is borned."

What could I say? It was cute. Squirrelly, but cute. That's my girl.

A last thought for today...

I think I have been reminded recently of something important. Be happy for today. Tomorrow will never be better if you carry your bad attitude forward. Yesterday only looks better because you have forgotten how negative things may have been as time dims memory.

Lately I had forgotten to appreciate those around me. Maybe my reminder came from my daughters' new obsession with VeggieTales, and hearing the positive messages repeatedly. And how can you argue with a talking cucumber?

So smile and be happy. It is contagious.

How does your garden grow?

Am loving the spring time this year. When we bought our house in June 2003, the garden was overgrown and dying. After ripping up EVERYTHING except a lilac tree, a weeping cherry and 2 evergreen bushes (we ripped out approximately 25 plants and trees that were crowded or dying) we had to dig up the existing beds and add a couple new ones. We now add 5-6 plants per year. This year was a 2nd lilac tree, a barberry, 2 more bog rosemary and two flowering almond trees, as well as a few perennials.

My efforts are finally paying off. My little bitty burning bushes (no more than twigs when I planted them in 2005) are now over 2 feet tall and filled out. They have grown 4 inches this year alone.

My hen and chicks (sempervivum) are my special favorites, although Dave thinks they look like an alien life form. But I love them--my grandmother always had them in her garden, and I thought it was so cool that the main plant would send out little "chicks." Kind of like a succulent spider plant. So, when we bough this house, I got a few from a lady thinning hers out. From 8 or nine plants and "chicks" I now have about 150 and still going strong. I am currently moving them from their metal planter to shady areas to use as ground cover. I love them--they are a great reminder of my childhood.

Currently I have lilacs, rosemary and sage in bloom, or on the verge. My weeping cherry just got done blooming. I have tulips to plant for next year. My goal is to eventually figure out a way to always have flowers in bloom... What could make for a more beautiful landscape?

Success!! Soto's diagnosis confirmed.

Well, much to my surprise, the doctor came through. His latest letter spelled it out. Despite normal NSD1 scan, she has Sotos Sundrome. He spells it out in his second letter that genetics are NOT conclusive, so his diagnosis stands.

Yay! Talked to her Early Intervention physical therapist, HF, today. HF said she was not at all surprised to hear that Anneliese has an overgrowth syndrome. It was awesome to talk to a professional who was conversant with the disorder. Most of our family and friends do not understand what Sotos is, and it is hard to explain. But, frankly, the diagnosis is for the medical and insurance communities, as LeeLee is still the little ray of sunshine she was before the arrival of Dr I's letter.

We are starting to head into stormier weather with her moods. Unfortunately, she is getting more frustrated at not getting her way--dressing, food choices, being read to, watching TV, etc--we get the tantrum to end all. We are beginning to wonder if this is just a three year old phase (like Sophia had as well) or if we are entering phase 2 with Anneliese, now that she is asserting her autonomy.

Who can say?

New MemoryWorks Catty--but....

Well, the release of the 2007-08 catalog is here. Every year, I get way excited to see what products will be available. I start planning what I "need" to buy. And the new catalog does not disappoint--Piggy Tales; Love, Elsie; new Autumn Leaves Acrylic Stamps; all the new Basic Grey; Crate Paper; Cosmo Cricket; 7 Gypsies. New bling, metals and brads--simply speaking, scrapper heaven.

Yet, this year the zing isn't there. I have so much going on in my personal life that this fades to the background. Which is as it should be. Tomorrow I take Anneliese to Univ of Mich hospital to the Pediatric Cardiology unit, to find out if there is a problem with her heart. Her Echocardiogram last month showed an anomaly. I also have Sophie's teacher conference to find out what steps the school is taking for Sophie to succeed next year in school. My dosage was just raised on my mood stabilizer because the stress is aggravating my bipolar.

And when I do scrapbook? I am doing more introspective pages, pages that reflect where we are in our life as a family. I think it is tiume to pull the Memory Makers idea book, Imperfect Lives, down off the shelf and give it another look through. Our lives are in transition right now, so scrapping only about the light fluffy events seems like a lie--I want our scrapbooks to reflect our real lives. I have begun a very personal book about my struggles and relationships with others. I want to really be on the page for those LOs, so that my children understand me down the road.

So, I still am excited about the MW catalog. That pales in significance, however, to how I will feel once I know my daughters are in a good place, both in the school system and in the medical community. And we will get there--I plan to guarantee it. And of course, I plan to scrap our progress, one day (and page) at a time.

Sotos..or not?

Well, after getting a letter from Anneliese's esteemed geneticist in Ann Arbor today, I had to call him. At one point, he gives a list of all her features that point to Sotos Syndrome. Sounds promising, right? At the end of the letter, he says the results of the NDS1 test is normal, and therefore, "these results do not support a diagnosis of Sotos."

So, I call him to ask about this, telling him of studies showing a 90% accuracy of this genetics test to determine Sotos. I also told him I was talking to him one last time before getting a second opinion. He assured me that he was an expert, no need to go further with another doctor, blah, blah blah. So I reiterate that I need a diagnosis, and he asks about the letter--won't it work for the insurance? I tell him that it is conflicting--at one point he says her symptomology is consistent with Soto, but three sentancers later states that the test results are not consistent with Sotos. He didn't see the problem. But, he will send another letter. (sigh....)

So, filled with confidence over my (not) reassuring discussion with the doctor, I sent in my records requests to get all the reports to forward on to a doctor who is aces in Sotos research. I feel like I never got an answer--all he would say was the genetics department liked to be conservative in their diagnosis. Conservative? How about CRYPTIC?? I need an answer about my daughter, not the runaround.

Babysteps, I guess. First step, mail the requests. Second step, wait for the records to arrive. Third step, ship it all to Nebraska.

And the fourth step? Pray.

Labels

All my life I have been fighting being labeled--only child; leftie; epileptic; brain tumor survivor; grad student; professor; manic depressive. There alway seems to be a preconceived notion associated with a label. In some cases, however, I am finding that a label can be a good thing.

How is that, you ask? Well, I am currently fighting to get a diagnosis for Anneliese (i.e., a label) in order to continue to get her the therapies and doctors she needs covered by the insurance. In the past 6 months, my 3 year old daughter has gone through an MRI, an Xray, an Echocardiogram and multiple blood draws to test for various genetic disorders and syndromes. We have heard our fill of syndrome names from geneticists and developmental pediatricians: Fragile X (blood work negative), Chromosomal abnormality (blood work negative), Marfan syndrome (echocardiogram negative).

We also were told about Sotos Syndrome. Anneliese seemed to fit 85% of the criteria for this disorder, so yet another blood test was order to check for a mutation of the NSD1 gene. Oh, and it will only take 6 weeks to come back. So, I broke down and called at the 5 week mark, and there were the results--normal. Sorry, Mrs. M, we can't help you further.

Meanwhile, I talk to the wonderful people on the Yahoo Sotos support group. Turns out that the genetic test is not infallible, and a clinical diagnosis can be made if your child displays certain traits/criteria. Guess what? She does. So, BANG! 4 days later I on the phone with another specialist at U of M, who I am told is very qualified and open to more ideas than bloodwork. And the mom that told me this had first seen the genetics specialist who was unwilling to help us further.

So, I have hope. I need to know my daughter's prognosis in order to get her more therapies, and know where we are going on this journey through special needs in the school system. I need to know that our family will be OK and get through this.

Above all, I need to know that my advocacy for my daughter will enable Anneliese to become the best person she can be. I will not stop until I know there are no more stones to turn over. This may not be how I pictured motherhood, but by heaven I will give my daughter the voice she has yet to find.

This is it...

The age of imaginary friends has entered my calm household. Who you might ask? Why Sophie has added an imaginary friend--namely Rocket from Little Einsteins on Playhouse Disney. There he is in that picture. No, not any of the smiling children (although Sophie assures me that June is her friend, too, but apparently not close enough for Sophie to let her in the house) but, the rocket ship.

He was in my living room today. They spent time playing "at the beach" in Sophie's room. And if I dared to speak to Rocket, Sophie and Rocket would leave the room. Tonight after supper, we all ate paczki, since it is Fat Tuesday today. Sophie made sure that we knew Rocket had to have a piece.

Very cute stuff here. I know that at Sophie's age my "friend" was Yogi Bear. Why Rocket instead of a person? Who knows. Just want to get this on record before it slips away, like so many other childhood moments.

Pajama & Soup Day

Well, like everyone else in the Midwest, we got dumped on--lots and lots and LOTS of snow. Needless to say, the girls had no school. Then Dave called this morning to tell me Ronald Reagan Airport in DC is closed, as are most of the Midwestern airports, so he may nott be able to get a flight home tonight as scheduled. ~~~sigh~~~ So, the girls and I are having a lazy pajama day.

So, like any other good Yooper, I made soup. Yummy Beef Barley Soup. Grandma always had soup on when the weather got cold--split pea or vegetable beef are the two I remember her making the most. I was always in awe that people could make soup (my mom was a Campbell's girl herself).

So, I chopped up a top round roast and browned it; then added I onion, celery, carrots, baby potatoes, green beans, tomato sauce and boullion. Added thyme, basil, bay leaves, salt and pepper. Throw in the barley. After 2 1/2 hours, sheer bliss in a bowl. Maybe even better than Grandma used to make....

Now if I could just master her baking powder biscuits.

The countdown begins...

This year for our birthdays, Larisa and I are planning to attend a weekend scrapbook retreat (Treehouse Getaways). We are going to be gone for three glorious days toward the end of march. So, the planning begins.

First I went and bought a new scrapbooking organizer/tote (what is this, the 6th or 7th?). After seeing a product called the ScrapALong, I found out that it is made by Plano Molding (the tackle box/tool box people). I ran out to Menards's and obtained one for $39.95 (Contractor Work Center 826). I love it. Drawers, pull-out container for albums, deep storage on top. Also cool is the steel bar that slides down the front when you aren't using it. After inserting the bar and slapping a pad lock (bought at Meijer yesterday) my scrapbook supplies are secure. Call me paranoid, but I would tather be safe than sorry.

The hardest part of planning this weekend is deciding what to bring. I am currently planning an 8x8 album of our autumn this year--pumpkin patch, decorating for Halloween, Autumn colors, and trick or treats. So, I know I can work on that. Also, I am saving Christmas and New Years too for that weekend. But I tend to overpack--ARRGGHHH!

I did change my eyelet/brad storage to increase portability. I switched to these little stacking screw together bead jars from Darice--30 in a small box. Works great and takes up a fraction of the room. Will I need all these at my retreat? Probably not. Will I feel more secure knowing they are there in the off-chance I need them? YOU BETCHA!!!

The trials and tribulations of the scrapper...

Well, this is weird

Here I sit--7:51 AM. David just left on a business trip to Washington, DC. He will be back Wednesday night. This is the first time ever we have been apart this long, except when dating. Feels really strange to me.

Funny how dependent we become on the little things--a smile, a bad joke, an email of a cartoon. It is a testament to my quiet, laid back husband that this formerly independent stubborn woman misses him already. That is the magic of love I guess.

And how my kids will deal with Daddy's absence remains to be seen. Hopefully all will be well--tonight is our girly pizza party, tomorrow is supper with Nana.

So, to quote Whitesnake, "Here I go again on my own." Another adventure....

That chilly time of year

I must be an odd duck--I love my Michigan winter. Yes, it is frigid out there this year. Being from the Upper Peninsula of Michigan, I grew up with that--snow on the ground and cold temperatures from Halloween to St Patty's Day. I love seeing the snow on the ground. When I first moved downstate in 1991, I hated the inconsistency of the weather--one week snow, the next week rain, then it was in the 40's. A month later it was 20 degrees. Yuck! This year, it is cold with snow on the ground. Seems like old times.

I don't really like summer that much. Insects, humidity and tornado warnings aren't my idea of fun. I do love my watermelon, though--best part of summer. Winter has Thanksgiving, Christmas, my birthday--things to look forward too, and seeing family and friends. Playing in the snow with my daughters, drinking cocoa and snuggling in front of the fire with my honey-bunny--life is good. Rich stews and chilis are just made for warming you up after a chilly afternoon outdoors. And there is nothing better than getting into bed after a long day, and slipping into a warm cocoon of blankets. As the chill of the room leaves you, and you start feeling toasty warm, it is so easy to fall asleep.

Even clothes are better in winter. Fuzzy sweaters, comfy flannel pjs, fleecey robes and slippers--all things that reek of comfort. Clothing that is very forgiving of that extra 5 pounds that invariably creeps on after the holidays.

So, it is with a little sadness that I see the last of winter melt away each year. As much as I love my garden and seeing the baby bunnies in my yard, I always feel a little regret that my winter idyll is over....

at least for one more year.

If I lived to be 100...

If I lived to be 100, would I rather have a sound mind or a fit body? Well, the women in my family live to be old--the hardy Scandinavian heritage showing. My grandmother died at the age of 87. Millie's final years were spent fighting senile dementia (she was never officially diagnosed with Alzheimers). She broke a hip a few years before her death, and resisted therapies and the doctor's suggestions. She had always been a very active woman--gardening, long walks with her dog, strawberry picking in the summer--and as her mind began to be fuzzy, her desire for activity lessened. I really think had her mind been sound, her prognosis toward the end would have been better. I the last six months of her life, Millies spine compressed and my father was forced to place her into a Medicare facility to provide her with appropriate care.

I want my mind to be sound at 100. I want to know the love of my family and be aware and involved with others. I don't want to forget the people that are important to me, and pick up a book and read for enjoyment. The tragedy of my grandmother lives in my mind. A feisty Irish/Norwegian woman, with a sense of humor, strong sense of family, a compulsive reader, was reduced to confusion in her final years. The last time I saw her, in December of 2002, she called me "Mona" the name of her youngest sister. She knew I was her granddaughter, but couldn't remember how. A moment of clarity bubbled through when I explained I was her son's daughter. She looked at me clearly and said, "ah, yes, from his first marriage."

And at that same visit, I had brought my daughter Sophia, age 9 months, to spend her first Christmas with her great-grandmother. My father told me that for months afterward, my grandmother talked about that beautiful baby. Some of my favorite pictures of my grandmother are from that visit, watching my grey haired grandmother and my tiny brown haired child touching hands and hearts.

Scrapping Thoughts

I have been thinking lately about why I scrap. This whole trade show every 3-4 months is getting old. Who has time to scrap with the ever-consuming desire to get "the latest and greatest" before everyone else. By the time we have all those precious items from the last CHA, the next trade show is here and we start again. ~~Sigh~~

I also notice that when I do sit down to scrap I reach for familiar old friends--Basic Grey Fusion or Vagabond, WRMK, Chatterbox, CatsEye Chalk inks, AC ribbon and Brads, and Chipboard. I have a ton of the first lines from Fancy Pants--ChiChi, FrouFrou, Dapper--and never reach for them. Too much like work to figure out a cool way to use them.

So, I have toned down my latest and greatest. I picked up some Primas, BG Fruitcake & Blush and Chatterbox Love Shack from the last show, and from this show will probably get the BG Pheobe. I am sticking with my tried and true loves for new products. My LOs use a lot of older product now, because I loved it when I bought it and they still look cool.

I scrapbook for me and my family. When my 3 and 4 year old daughters clamor to look at the scrapbooks I make, it is not to see the new CHA product artistically displayed on a Bohemian style page (with a giant bird, of course). It is to see pictures of their family and friends, pets and celebrations. It is a way for two little girls to see the grandfather they loved (and who died too soon) and remember his love for them. My book of me is a bit more upscale, but after I am gone I want my daughters to know who I was, not how well I displayed product without the memories to accompany it.

I think I am passionate about these memories being the focus because I lost my mom at age 52--her childhood and early life are lost to me because she never wrote any of this down. My grandmother died with Alzheimers--again, memories lost, because now I have questions about things that never seemed important at the time. I want my children to understand who I was and how I feel about events and people in our lives that are important to us.

That is what I am passionate about--leaving the next generation a legacy.